I finally opened my heart and poured my soul out. Not exactly how I wanted to do it, not exactly in the right setting, or with the right frame of mind, but I did it. I couldn't hold it in me any longer. Truthfully, I feel much better. It's like the weight of the world was taken off my shoulders. Sure, deep inside, I feel miserable, but at the very least, I don't have this huge thing inside of me, eating away all that was left of my soul.
I had no illusions, honestly. I knew. Still, it's rather hard listening for the 100th time in my life that I'm a very special person, but. There's always that but. It's not that I don't understand where this comes from, I do. It's just that having heard that so many times, I end up feeling like I was always good, just simply not good enough, for anyone. And that makes me wonder what "good" or "special" actually means.
It won't be easy, moving forward. But slowly, I'll pick up my pace, even if I have to crawl out of here...
"Nunca é demasiado tarde para seres aquilo que devias ter sido." (George Sand)
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